Friday, 9 November 2012

The Rise Of The Dad (For One Week At Least)

For the first time since I took over from The Chancellor, men outnumbered women at a baby group today. I am claiming this a win for dads despite the fact that there are only five babies in the group. Even though this group is small it was nice not to be in the minority and it was the lone woman banished into the corner of the changing room instead of me. Next week though we will return to me saying 'Can I come out now?'

I was a bit worried to take the wee man out out after a 'minor' accident this morning which resulted in a black eye for the boy. Being a boy who can now climb he was attempting to get inside his box plastic toy box. Not knowing what friction is yet he hasn't realised that socks on shiny plastic means he will slide very quickly. This he did and he fell, smashing his eye on the side of the plastic box. There was of course that ominous silence and breath holding then he let rip and told me exactly how he felt. Poor little bugger.

Very quickly a bruise appeared which I don't think I can hide from The Chancellor even in soft light. Luckily it has reduced but he still looks like he has been boxing. I was waiting for 'those' looks today and I was ready to say 'He did it himself! He was playing! I'm not an abusive parent!' But luckily no looks came.

Anyway The Chancellor won't have time to question me under a lamp as she is off out to get horrendously drunk and come will come home in wee hours waking us all up. Wait...that sounds more like me. She will be home by ten after a couple of cocktails. But it will be a nice chance for her to see some of the other mummies again and they will moan that I'm not as fun as her and that they want her back. Sorry ladies you're stuck with me for another year at least.


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