Saturday, 26 January 2013

Jamie Sassoon

Is it ever acceptable to chase your child around the house with a pair of scissors in your hand? I didn't think so either. These kinds of antis may well scar then for the rest of their life. And of course teach them that running with scissors pointing up is a good thing. How many goblets of bad parenting you can bestow in such a short period of time?

The wee man's hair is long to point of making him look slightly effeminate. He is now sporting a mullet but here in the North East that is not necessarily a bad thing. This is of course the place where Kevin Keegan made them look fashionable. Thanks for that Kevin. So I have been determined to cut his hair but The Chancellor like the mother she is won't let me anywhere near his hair as she thinks I will do a bad job. So I spend my time chasing them around the flat in an effort to get my hands on his hair.

How hard can it be to cut a child's hair? He has such a small head so logic would dictate that any haircut would and should take no time at all. "Have you cut hair before Jamie?" I hear you ask. No I haven't but there is a first time everything. If I can do DIY I can cut hair.

I have given The Chancellor deadlines to book him in for an appointment or the alternative is me with my fairly blunt kitchen scissors and my artistic flair. But for some reason she has this obsession to keep his hair longer. Did she secretly want a daughter or does she just like men who are slightly androgynous. I by the way have cut my long hair so I now no longer look androgynous. Anyway who knows what her problem is but either way she has until tomorrow evening to book him into a hairdressers or I'll be doing it on Monday morning when she's at work.

Pictures will be published of my skills, unless it's really crap then I won't be taking pictures of him for a long long time.


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